This mom is in the state of complete exhaustion. Worn out by extreme physical work. Yesterday was day of grounding for me and my whole family. Just bare with me and you will see why.
According to the law we need to have conventional septic system here on our land. Duh! So I spend whole day in the hole digging with my own two hands. It could be much easier to hire somebody to do it for us. But we decided not to do business with the banks ( at least not for some time) and go with the ‘do it yourself’ method…hmmm…
Enthusiastic and green this might look but one have to have a lot of energy and will to go through all of this. Every part of your being gets challenged in the process. For me, for example this day was fusion of powerful workout, super-duper family fun, bitter-sweet memories of my life and totally spiritual connection with my family and the Earth itself! Not to mention sequence of despair of putting my self in to this mess.
As I happily jumped in the hole to join my dear husband and the children I started singing and laughing. They followed, they sang, they laughed…but time passed and I got tired and I stopped to rest. Then I continued and again stopped and rest and so on and so forth.
Time passed and I got in serious conversation with my oldest son…remembering life and death. Talk about my mom, his beloved deceased grandma. Cycles of creating, maintaining, destroying. All three in one. Brahma, Vishnu, Shiva came to visit us in this earthy hole. All at once.
Then, as time passed on…I started thinking differently. Still working, still sweating. Then mood swings hit ruthlessly. Kids just witnessed my madness. I was in despair once more. Pain, fatigue and resistance. While covered with dirt I was thinking of nice spa treatment and vacation on Mediterranean. Why am I digging here for God sake!?? My pain body was screaming. Steel connected to the Earth I didn’t let go I just stud there working and witnessing all of my feelings. Then everything disappeared even me I think for a second. I love when that happens. And everything turned in to fun once again.
Thank God I steel can envision my house, little greenhouse and every corner of our land…planing places for the trees and fairy houses. For the rock garden and the wind charms. Orchard. Bird houses and water fountains…Everything became clear once more. Even clearer then ever before.
Thank God for this experience, hard work, breath and ability to share this with you.
On the end of the day there is purpose beaming in to your face. Peace at hearth. Happy, healthy kids. Totally grounded and peaceful. You spent all day together. There you go. Quality time in it’s fullest. While digging giant hole!? Who would say! They, your loved ones see every bit of you and help you see it too. You couldn’t hide even if you wanted to. Naked, bare and totally raw, you stand in front of them. And you loved it, every bit of it.